Good points and bad points

Firstly an apology. Due to a rather delightful trip to Brussels with my better half, I was not able to do a blog after last week’s game.

Unfortunately, I clearly drank too much in the EU capital (which was fantastic by the way, if a little pricey) and I can’t really remember many details of the game! I know we won by quite a large margin but I’ll be damned if I can remember anything else…

Anyway, on to last night’s game at the Waggon and Horses at Doulting Beacon which was, for once, not shrouded in flog and soaked in tumultuous Mendip downpours. We were playing an all-female team so it was a good job the Fat Controller wasn’t there or we’d have lost him for the night…

We won the game by 27. Which was good. But we hit our lowest score of the season. Which was bad. But we kept hitting pins despite the demoralising score. Which was good. But I hit 32 and my lowest score of the season. Which was bad.

Top scorer was our man on the bottom Alan, who knocked 45 and took all the money. Next up was Mr T Lethaby Snr whose 43 keeps him in the hunt at the top of the averages, followed by DJ with 42 – his missile-like deliveries scaring the sticker-upper on numerous occasions.

I must make a couple of extra mentions as well. Firstly, sorry to Joe The New Kid for tipping my pint of Coke all down his jeans, I hope you’ve dried out now. And secondly, best of luck to Hurricane Hellard, who goes in to hospital on Monday to have a hip replacement, which will rule him out for the rest of the season.

Next week we play at home against Team Alvis, knowing that another win could almost seal promotion already. Fingers crossed for some top scoring. Anyway, until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Alan – always one to join in the verbal abuse, our ex-newspaper group chief executive (pictured right looking very dapper) has been a Team Clothier member for many years. He plays less regularly these days, but when he does, he can still pull a score out of the bag.

Whatever the weather

Once again it was the weather which dominated our match last night as we were caught out by floods, snow drifts and blizzards.

We were playing at East Harptree on the concrete alley, and on the way there it was the deep flood waters resembling tropical water-splashes which caused concern, especially as none of us were driving big 4x4s normally used to tackle said torrents.

Then, halfway through the game, Mr T Lethaby Snr announced that snow was falling and settling. We tried to speed up the game but were hampered by the slowest sticker-up known to man.

On the way home, Team Clothier went in convoy and by now the roads resembled something you would find in the arctic. My MG struggled going up hill, but the best manoeuvre was performed by Mr T Lethaby Snr whose car did a Bambi on ice sliding impression near the Mendip Inn. Thankfully all of us got home safely.

As for the match, we were playing Team Currell and we won by 39 after winning all six legs. We are not huge fans of the Harptree Club alley but we hit one of our highest scores of the season and certainly our best ever there.

Top dogs were Wyatt Earp and Mr T Lethaby Snr who both hit 49 with a spare apiece, followed by me with 47, again including a spare. Skipper was in the Chair and for once failed to take much money, having to pay everyone bar one.

Next week we are back at the Poacher’s Pocket for a home game on Wednesday against Team Young. By then hopefully the snows and flood waters will have gone and we can worry about giving each other verbal abuse as usual. Anyway, until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Wyatt Earp – the team’s resident gunslinger, pictured right, is another who has featured in the side for many years. Currently enjoying his best season for some time, Wyatt will be sorely missed over the next month or so as he has to take a break following an operation on his hand.

Get the snow chains ready

Team Clothier had a game in hand on most of the division so what does Skipper do? Arrange it for one of the snowiest nights of the year.

After Monday night’s conditions we thought we had seen the worst of the weather, but just as we arrived at the Poacher’s Pocket, the white stuff started to fall again. And it kept falling all game until we were ready to go.

By this point some of our cars were somewhat snowed in – Pasty got his out despite a barrage of snowballs from Nashy, DJ and Joe The New Kid. Mine was the farthest into the car park and the deepest in snow, but I put my knowledge of Rally Sweden to the test and got out of the thick stuff fine. Unfortunately, I then got to the icy main bit of the car park and promptly couldn’t get anywhere. Thankfully Mr T Lethaby Snr was on hand to lend a bit of weight, and he helped by pushing my car and I got away.

But what of the game? Well, we were playing Team Freestone who we beat by only four last week, and again it proved to be a tight encounter. We had fallen 14 behind after the first leg, but pulled back to only four down by the fourth leg.

We then monstered the leg and hit 81 thanks to two spares, but it could have been more if I hadn’t wasted my spare ball by throwing it straight through. We were 26 up going into our last leg but we didn’t hit too good a score. When they suddenly had two spares it made things interesting, but we won out by 10 in the end.

Top scorer on the night for us was Hurricane Hellard with a storming 53, followed by me with 50, thanks to me actually taking advantage of a spare and hitting 14 on the last leg. Joe The New Kid was in the Chair and he hit 48 meaning he only had to pay Hurricane and I.

It’s Nashy’s birthday on Saturday (watch out the pubs of Shepton/Wells/Street) so he did the five half-pint challenge last night and got his best time. He came in with a very respectable 12 minutes 36 seconds.

Next week we play away at Harptree Club, in East Harptree, on Monday on the concrete alley where we may or may not be playing with the rubber balls (ooh err missus, and all that). Let’s hope the snow stays away but looking at the forecast I may need to hunt out those snow chains. Anyway, until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Hurricane Hellard – Hurricane (pictured front right in this old photo of Team Clothier from 1999) has been a member of the team since it was started some 40 years ago. A lynchpin of the side, normally playing at number four, he is also known for his performances on the dancefloor at the team’s Christmas bash…

Handling the pressure

It was a damp and misty night atop the Mendips. Two hardy skittles teams were locked in combat in a crucial game at the top of D Division.

Team Freestone had home advantage and the edge with just two legs remaining. Knowledge of their tough alley and a spare had put them 11 up and things were looking rosy.

However, they had not reckoned with Team Clothier’s spirit. A fightback began on leg five, as Skipper and his squad pulled five back to leave the two teams separated by six with a leg to go. The pressure was beginning to get to Team Freestone, they hit a lowly 47 leg on their last go and Team Clothier knew they were in with a shout.

Consistency throughout the team’s scores on the final leg left the anchor man needing four to win it. He stepped up and his first ball took just the back pin. The pressure increased when his second ball took only two more. Everyone held their breath as he threw the last delivery of the game… and managed to knock down four more to take the victory! Who was this heroic anchorman? Oh yeah – it was me…

After taking the plaudits and being very chuffed with myself, I then realised I had only hit 40 overall and had to buy my man a drink. I got money off the Chair though – DJ hit 36 and had to pay pretty much the entire team.

Top scorers for us were Mr T Lethaby Snr and Hurricane Hellard who both hit 43 to help their away averages no end.

Also a notable mention must go to Joe The New Kid who tackled the five half-pint challenge for the first time. His time of 14 minutes and 34 seconds was the quickest so far of the people who have done it and who don’t have a drink problem.

Next week we are not sure whether we have a game yet. It is a cup week and our interested ended a few months ago in the cups. However, we still have our game in hand against Team Freestone to play, so we might be back at the Poacher’s Pocket on Wednesday against the same opposition. Watch this space. Until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Joe The New Kid (pictured) – it has to be Joe for his five half-pint challenge performance. One of the hairiest members of Team Clothier, Joe The New Kid has become an excellent acquisition for the side this year. He had never really played skittles before, but as a goalkeeper for Belrose he was used to seeing balls hitting woodwork.

Streaking clear

Team Clothier is back on a roll and moving clear at the top of D Division of the Mendip Farmers League.

Last night we defeated the team of John Witts who were second in the league behind us. We now lead the table by three points, with two points for a win. We also have a game in hand so we are feeling slightly confident.

This was a tough match with the lead swinging one way and then the other like a confused transvestite. However, on the fourth leg (which we are notoriously bad in) we hit a 69 and pulled clear. We then kept pulling away until we won by a comfortable 24.

Leading the way in the team was our very own gunslinger Wyatt Earp who hit a top shootin’ 51, followed by Nashy who hit 50 which might just, possibly, maybe, mean he is top of the averages. Top score overall though was Mr T Lethaby Snr, who hit 60 on the bottom, but then there is no pressure when you’re not in the side

The Fat Controller was in the Chair and had a mixed night. He hit 46 so drew money off most people but it could have been so much more. After starting with two eights, he then got a flopper to much cheers. However, the glory went to his head and he put the next two balls straight through. It’ll take a while for him to live that down…

I hit 45 so had to pay the Chair but I hit a nice spare myself so I am pleased with my night’s work, especially as I beat my man.

Next week we play another team near the top, Team Freestone. These guys were third by the latest table I’ve seen and they also have a game in hand. This, of course, is against us, so it is another crucial week. If we win at the Waggon and Horses on Tuesday, then we really would have our fate in our own hands as far as the title goes. Anyway, until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Mr T Lethaby Snr – Our usual number two in the team is known to occasionally cross-dress (pictured) and to always lose things, such as keys, wallet, phone, passport... However, he’s normally one of our most consistent players, even if he does have a beard. Humorous tales are too many to mention them all, just if you ever meet him, ask him about the time he downed a shot, wobbled to his feet, proclaimed “I played rugby y’know” and strode out of the pub before I could even get my drink to my lips…

Random number generators

Consistency was notable by its absence this week, but Team Clothier has still kept up its title push with another win.

We were playing Dave Watts’ team at the George in Gurney Slade and were victorious by 16, but our inconsistency almost cost us the match.

Having worked our way into a 12-pin lead we then conspired to hit a 42 leg which, as anyone who has ever played league skittles will know, is complete and utter pants. We suddenly went to being five down and things were looking shakier than a nervous jelly.

However, Team Clothier is never one to take such rubbish lying down, and we stepped up and hit a 66 leg and promptly were nine ahead again, leading eventually to the 16-pin win.

Chief random number generator, but top scorer, was Nashy (see player of the week below) who started and ended with a spare, but hit a 3 in there as well to end with 51. Second highest was the Fat Controller was hit a rather good 47, including a couple of hands when he thought he had a spare but couldn’t see the other end of the alley well enough to see that there was still a pin standing.

I hit 40, but that should have been more as I got a spare on my first hand and then chucked the last ball down the left-hand gutter – getting too excited I guess! Wyatt Earp was in the Chair and hit 42, drawing from most of the team.

As we tucked into our sandwiches and chips after the game, which were very nice by the way, it got me thinking. What is the best and worst skittles food you’ve ever been served? As for me, the Apple Tree at West Pennard used to do full-on fish and chips which was great and our home alley, the Poacher’s Pocket, always puts on a good spread. On the rubbish side, I could name a few who have given us dodgy curries or stale bread…

Our game next week is on Wednesday at home against fellow pace-setters Team Witts, one of only two teams to defeat us in the league this season, the other being Watts who we beat last night. Anyway, until then…

Go for wood!

Tim

Player of the week: Nashy – Our opener (pictured) has excelled at that position since moving there for this season. Being a, whisper it, estate agent Nashy has plenty of time on his hands these days which he spends, we reckon, practising skittles, hence the top scores this year.

A new year and a new challenge

Team Clothier moves into 2009 equal top in D Division of the Mendip Farmers Skittles League and hoping for the title. However, our charge into the new year was halted by the fact that we didn’t have a game scheduled this week.


So we decided to keep our hand in with a friendly game, but little did we know what a challenge it would be.


We decided to invite all the Team Clothier SWAGS along to play. SWAGS stands for Skittles Wives And Girlfriends and most of us were promptly shown up. We rotated the team so it went Team Clothier member, SWAG, Team Clothier member and so on so things were even, but Skipper’s side beat mine by 10.


Mr T Lethaby Snr starred on the night with 50 but his SWAG for the night was DJ so he could focus on his game. Nashy just beat Mrs Nashy by 1, but Hurricane Hellard lost out and faced much abuse! I hit a well-earned but spare-free 41.


Another player to just beat their better half was Pasty. Now Pasty had his birthday on Monday so he had to face the five half-pint challenge last night, which made for an entertaining evening. Not known as a big drinker, Pasty achieved a rather good 19 minutes for the challenge but was flying afterwards. I couldn’t possibly repeat some of the stuff he was saying, suffice to say it was amusing and rather X-rated.


The skittles season resumes proper next Tuesday at the George in Gurney Slade. Last night’s scores do not count towards who gets in the team so it should be a similar side to that which played at Chew Magna just before Christmas. Anyway, until then…


Go for wood!


Tim


Player of the week: Pasty (pictured) – our regular at the number three slot in the side has to be featured this week as he tackled the five half-pint challenge. A member of Team Clothier for a good eight years or so he has been known to discuss tactics until the wee small hours. One of his most famous Team Clothier moments was when he got rather drunk one night at the Sheppey Inn, Godney, and heckled a player for foot faulting despite the opponent having to use two walking sticks to stay upright…